Despite my vast and skeptical dislike of government, I would *totally* approve the funding of that. I’ll even approve a temporary sales tax to fund if you let me pull the trigger.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rayleigh%E2%80%93Taylor_instability

I will give you odds on that going to Charlie Bolden.

See: http://www.jsc.nasa.gov/Bios/htmlbios/bolden-cf.html

Click for an image I posed for: http://www.aviationarthangar.com/frs19.html That’s me in the Receiver on AR313. Ah, those were the days!

No, actually you’ll end up with a casting error on compile

Comic timing is better on that one. I’ve also heard, “Sees that water will indeed put out fire, leaves the remaining blaze as an exercise for the fire department, and goes back to sleep.”

I actually really like the fact that we haven’t figured out everything about the universe yet .

Keep the surprises coming I say!

The top three jobs involve math and statistics? Can you say “researcher bias,” children? I knew you could!

Summary: ***FAIL!***

I have a math-professor friend that describes his profession in the geekiest way: with a Lord of the Rings analogy.

He says that in a world of science, mathematics is the one evil ring that rules them all.

Three Rings for the astronomers under the sky,
Seven for the Geologists in their halls of stone,
Nine for Biologists doomed to die,
One for the Physicist on his dark throne
In the Land of Dark Matter where the Shadows lie.

Mathematics to rule them all, Mathematics to find them,
Mathematics to bring them all and in the darkness bind them
In the Science where the Shadows lie.

I love the phrasing for the description of a mathematician: “Applies mathematical theories and formulas to teach or solve problems in a business, educational, or industrial climate.” Mathematicians teach. Oh yeah, or solve, y’know, problems and stuff.

I think they should have used Erdos’s summary for what a mathematician does: “turns coffee into theorems”.

I like this quote too: “After the top three math-oriented careers, the rest of the top 10 read like a who’s who of well-educated professions”. Well, yeah. Who woulda thunk it? Business-jargon-spouting middle manager isn’t in the top 10? How surprising! And the bottom 10 involve hefting crap around. Hmm, I’m using my supermathbrain to see a pattern in these data…

Another alternate ending to the fire joke: the mathematician goes into the physicist’s room and hands him a bucket. Having reducing the problem to one already solved, he goes back to bed.

How many astronomers does it take to change a lightbulb? 10^5. Plus or minus 10^8.

Here’s a few philosopher light bulb jokes from http://www.ahajokes.com/lig041.html

Q: How many philosophers does it take to change a lightbulb ?
A: Hmmm… well there’s an interesting question isn’t it ?

Q: How many philosophers does it take to change a lightbulb ?
A: Three. One to change it and two to stand around arguing over whether or not the lightbulb exists.

Q: How many philosophers does it take to change a lightbulb ?
A: Define “lightbulb”.

Q: How many philosophers does it take to change a lightbulb ?
A: Two. One to change it and one to think deeply and come up with a real gem, such as “Well there you are, standing on a chair, changing a lightbulb. Here we see the difference between a cat and a dog. If you have a cat, it looks up at you, thinks ‘What are you doing ?’, and walks off. But if you have a dog, it’s looking up at you and thinking ‘Well, I dunno what you’re doing, but I love you anyway.’

How come philosopher comes in at #12? Does that even count as a job? Because I do a lot of philosophizing and I imagine I’d have a really hard time if I tried to convince somebody to pay me for it. “Hey, guess what, everybody? The universe doesn’t have an inherent purpose, because purpose is a human-created concept. The only purpose in our lives is the one we define for ourselves! That’ll be $50 please.”

[Googling him I learned that he had the magnificent handle Hermann von Helmholtz.]

How many biologists does it take to change a light bulb?

One, but he has to wait until the individual dies – then he can remove it to go on and localize the extant population with the same observed sleeve chirality; mating behavior and so speciation seems to be contingent upon it, but this must be considered a mere historical accident of bulb evolution.

The astronomer: “Ha, every sheep in Ireland is black!”
The physicist: “At least one sheep in Ireland is black!”
The mathematician: “At least there is one sheep in Ireland that has at least one side being black!”