I don’t know which is more brilliant, the headline,
Guns N’ Peas Is Where the Trajectory of Man Began It’s Steady Decline
or this passage:
Let’s face it. We all know that, thanks to pollution and war and overpopulation, we will eventually end up destroying our species. But the video linked here represents the exact moment the doomsday clock was activated. We aren’t going to advance any further now. We aren’t going to invent nanobots or flying cars or hang out with aliens. There won’t be world peace. We aren’t going to invent clean energy. That isn’t going to happen now. What’s going to happen is that everything will get worse and then we will all die. The world will commit suicide. AND FERGIE IS TO BLAME.
I was tempted to agree until I recalled last year’s monstrosity, itself an affront to fond memories of my misspent youth.