The Onion provides an explicit example of why it’s important for the President of the United States to have a science advisor. In this case it shows how the right one, with the appropriate background in string theory, could have been extremely useful to Bill Clinton.
[Thanks to Eleanor Cawston for pointing this one out to me]



October 12th, 2005 at 11:42 pm
Okay, I have to admit that was funny. This, too. (Via Feministe.)
October 13th, 2005 at 11:54 am
A physicist was able to get extramarital head without paying for it? Perhaps the prospects of “physicist as rock star” are looking up? (Just kidding!)
October 13th, 2005 at 2:27 pm
Any comments on this?
October 13th, 2005 at 2:46 pm
How about, “You see why tenure is useful?”
October 13th, 2005 at 5:42 pm
Another new element has been found too:
Subject: New Element
A major research institution has announced the discovery of the
heaviest element yet known to science – “governmentium.” It has 1
neutron, 12 assistant neutrons, 75 deputy neutrons and 111 assistant
deputy neutrons for an atomic mass of 312. These 312 particles are held
together by forces called morons that are further surrounded by vast
quantities of lepton-like sub particles called peons.
Governmentium has no electrons and is therefore inert. It can be
detected however since it impedes every reaction it comes into contact
with. A tiny amount of governmentium can take a reaction that normally
occurs in seconds and slow it to the point where it take days.
Governmentium has a normal half life of three years. It doesn’t decay
but “re-organizes”, a process where assistant deputy neutrons and
deputy neutrons change places. This process actually causes it to grow
as in the confusion some morons become neutrons, thereby forming
isodopes.
This phenomenon of “moron promotion” has led to some speculation that
governmentium forms whenever sufficient morons meet in concentration
forming critical morass. Researchers believe that in Governmentium, the
more you re-organize, the morass you cover.
October 13th, 2005 at 5:51 pm
No doubt an isotope of “administratium“, discovered a long time ago, occuring naturally in the mineral bureaucatite? Seems to have very similar properties.
-cvj
October 14th, 2005 at 4:46 pm
Sean’s site was funny. But what’s funnier in that site is its Ads by Google :
Christianity
Free to Join. 1000’s of pictures Of Beautiful Christian Singles
http://www.loveandseek.com
woowoo!