http://arXiv.org/abs/physics/0205089

as the most intelligently fabricated paper of the 20th century. A compassionate world would give massive majority funding and exclusive publishing priority to the worst contenders, just as social policy does. One fervidly anticipates the academic equivalent of income redistribution wherein a large fraction of the productivity of able scientists would confiscated and awarded to disabled ones, by law. Those who do nothing at all would be the most richly assured of a bountiful periodically incremented vita.

Quotas for supporting the incompetent are forbidden. Those who do not meet their quotas will be crushed. We’ll call that “Fair Research Practice.”

Today is the last day to vote in Cosmic Variance’s Greatest Physics Paper contest. If you haven’t voted yet, go over there and pick a paper. Locally, I’m still collecting nominees for the Greatest Physics Experiment. A quick scan through…