You Say Large Hadron Collider, I Say Sizeable Particle Crasher

By Andrew Moseman | September 12, 2008 5:09 pm

LHC“The Ultra-Mega-Huge Proton Destroyer.”

“Yet Another Physics Experiment That Won’t Bring About the Apocalypse.”

“Old Smashy.”

Ah, forget it. I can’t think up a new name for the Large Hadron Collider, but maybe you can.

Britain’s Royal Society of Chemistry, perhaps jaded that their experiment didn’t involve billion-dollar holes in the ground, have decided to get in on the fun of the LHC. They want people to submit suggestions for a new name, because let’s face it: While accurate enough, “Large Hadron Collider” as a name doesn’t exactly stir the emotions.

To send in your suggestion for a moniker that better captures the LHC’s potential to unveil secrets of the universe, go here. Good luck—the contest ends Wednesday.

Image: flickr/μμ

  • tresmal

    How about Satan’s Stargate
    I had a chance to buy Acme Tinfoil Hats when it was only five dollars a share, and I didn’t. I could just kick my self.

  • Robert Marsh II

    LHC Public Alert Update: Hackers Mounted An Attack Upon The LHC!

    —A group of hackers identified as the Greek Security Team inserted their logo, and warned the CERN LHC not to mess with them. They conveyed the idea, that they did not wish to disrupt the ‘warm-up’ exercises, but wanted to prove LHC security is seriously lacking during a cyberattack! Meetings are now in progress to guard against further outside security intrusions in the future. One problem initially sighted LHC’s wide-open public profile, and their connections to all major communication systems worldwide: An Achilles Heel!
    Now just imagine the LHC running wide-open at full-blast in 2009, with preparations to execute possibly dangerous heavy Lead (Pb) ion collisions, and a sweeping DNS cyberattack knocks-out all Internet and telephone services. Now the LHC controls are in the hands of some unknown cyber-warriors, and in the midst of this complete brain-numbing chaos, miraculously, a single telephone begins to ring! The receiver is picked-up in the LHC control-room, and someone on the other end, in some unfamiliar foreign tongue (Islamic radical), is rattling off a set of time-limits for their ‘list of demands’. What are they going to do??? They better have strong underwear made of that NASA Tempur-Pedic Foam material, and fashioned into emergency diapers!
    But most seriously, the LHC is not even warmed up yet, and scientists are designing the next larger facility: The International Linear Collider (ILC). 31 miles long, comprising of two giant linear ‘guns’ accelerating electrons and antimatter at near light-speed, and smashing them together. Yet another 8-10+ billion dollar investment. To read the Times-Online ILC article go to the following link: science/article4749224.ece

    “To read: “Hackers Attack Large Hadron Collider”, just Google this title with:

    Everyone is invited to join a personal ongoing CERN LHC/ALICE/ATLAS Public Debate Forum Invitational in progress, through the following Url:

  • Pingback: Looking for Dark Matter? Dig Deeper…Literally | Discoblog | Discover Magazine()


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