Once upon a time I was drumming in a pretty sweet band called Pistil with Megan Dawson on bass and Ann Starling and guitar. But they were practicing every week and booking shows around the Triangle, while I was sporadically in town between traveling and work commitments. We agreed that the very talented Ian Kleinfeld should take my place and now Pistil is better than ever…

Since this marks the final day that Silence Is The Enemy is raising funds for Doctors Without Borders, we’ll end the month with a bang–a song about two perspectives of rape called Mouse and Monster from the band. And remember, June was only the beginning. Momentum continues to build and our goal remains to draw attention to sexual abuse globally and encourage everyone to talk about it and act.

Megan explains why she wrote the song:

I’d been reading a lot of justifications for victim blaming, most specifically the term “Gray Rape” at the time.  I was so sick of hearing that there were legitimate reasons, under certain circumstances to coerce, force, or intimidate another person into sex.  There isn’t.  The line is always consent, and if its unclear, there isn’t consent.

In our society, we go around pretending like women bare the burden of sexual restraint, we refuse to place the blame on men to control themselves and allow them room to wiggle their way our of accountability.  Which means that blame falls on women.  I’m sick of feeling like if I dress a certain way, then some men get a free pass to behave a certain way.  I’m sick of feeling like if I drink too much, I am at fault for someone else’s behavior.  I’m sick of being a sexual gatekeeper.  I’m sick of our society not holding men accountable for their actions.  I’m sick of the lack of outrage regarding the made-up concept of “Gray Rape.” I’m sick of patronizing leaders assuming that the answer to rape culture is to corral women into behaving in a certain way.

The song is written from both  a victim and perpetrator’s perspective; from a man who is making all the stereotypical excuses and from a woman who is sick of taking blame.  Its both social commentary and narrative of a rape culture and the ambiguity surrounding it.

Mouse and Monster by Pistil

(lyrics after the jump)

I’m fluctuating now between mouse and monster
I’m fluctuating now between mouse and monster
And I probably shouldn’t have chased her
But self control is not my virtue as you say sir

I’m fluctuating now between mouse and monster
And she probably shouldn’t have dressed so sexy
And she probably should’ve said no more vocally
And she probably shouldn’t have had so much to drink

But it’s not me, it’s not me, it’s not me, it’s not me, it’s not me, I won’t take the blame
Yeah it’s not me, it’s not me, it’s not me, it’s not me, it’s not me, I won’t take the blame
Nooo I won’t take the blame I won’t take the blame
I won’t take the blame

Her role as gatekeeper is wearing thin
All her liberation is failing
Lest be the scapegoat she best not leave the safety nest

Because her daddy gotta protect her
Politician gotta protect her
Jesse Helms gotta protect her
Sarah Palin gotta protect her

Oh daddy save her from herself
Oh preacher save her from herself
Oh pharmacy save her from herself
Oh doctor save her from herself

I’m fluctuating now between mouse and monster

* Those in the Triangle area can catch Pistil this Thursday at The Pinhook in Durham *

And make sure to click these links all day–it’s your last chance to contribute to Doctors Without Borders by visiting:

The Intersection
On Becoming A Domestic And Laboratory Goddess
Aetiology
Neurotopia
Bioephemera
The Questionable Authority
Adventures in Ethics and Science
DrugMonkey
Blog Of The Moderate Left
Seattle Grassroots Examiner
the rugbyologist
Sciencewomen